Anytime I need a laugh, Heather and Jessica over at Go Fug Yourself always deliver. The sidebar comments say why better than I could:
“Hilarious bitches” — Defamer
“Confirming everyone’s secret conviction that women are evil bayotches whose greatest pleasure is ripping other women’s looks and fashion sense to shreds.” — LA.com
“A barbed wit that makes Cojo and Joan Rivers seem like gushing fans.” — Variety
“Fantastically bitchy… great fun, unless you are famous.” — The Guardian
How the two of them can be so original, so hilarious, so accurate in their creative bitchiness is something I can only marvel at.
Today I was checking out the latest posts mocking several actresses along with a bit of praise for one that finally wore something flattering. I read this passage in the middle of a Heather post about Katherine Heigl’s Entertainment Weekly creepy cover photo on the June 8th issue:
She’s turned into a terrific actress, for one thing, and she’s also completely adorable. To all those haters on message boards who say she’s fat just because she isn’t a twig like Ellen Pompeo, I say, A POX ON YOU. That is CRAZY TALK. We should all be so lucky as to be as “fat” as Katherine Heigl, what with her perfect curves and her pretty face and her completely NORMAL, healthy body (not to mention the fact that she’s probably still a size 4 or something, because this town is totally dysfunctional).
I usually don’t develop celebrity crushes; that being said, I’ve long considered Heigl to be one of the hottest actresses working today, because she is normal and healthy. Forty years ago, her celebrity stills would have been plastered everywhere because she would have fit the feminine ideal. Today, people consider her fat because she doesn’t disappear when she turns sideways?
I trust Heather to write well-researched posts along with the snark, but I could scarcely believe it. Utilizing a Google search with ‘Heigl’ and ‘Fat’, I had to see for myself if there was any truth to it.
There was. Oh Lord, there was.
The worst was a IMDB thread ripping her appearance in “Knocked Up.”
I’m not going to link it.
I do agree with this chick which my Google search turned up:
Why am I reading the IMDb boards for Knocked Up? First off, the post saying that Katherine Heigl’s gotten fat compared to when she was fourteen made me want to install a “Punch An Idiot” button on my laptop.A.) Women do tend to gain weight between the time they’re fourteen and their twenties. It’s called growing an ass and some breasts.
B.) I can’t remember if Katie Heigl’s a size six or a size eight, but as someone who hovers between both sizes, SHUT UP.
Still consider her ‘fat’?
Because if you do, I will install a ‘Punch The Idiot’ button on my laptop. (Great line, trollprincess!)